Dear (insert my real name),
Share your story, win great prizes and connect with other success couples like you. (win great prizes. yes please. wait, "other success couples like you"? when did i become a success couple? when did i even become a couple with someone? last time i checked i haven't even gone out on a date yet.)
Over the years, couples like you—that have found so much happiness and joy on eHarmony—have been requesting a way to share your stories with other like-minded eHarmony couples. During the next several weeks, eHarmony will be launching its Facebook page and we’re kicking it off with the Celebration of Love, a special tribute to success couples like you. (happiness and joy. really? i'm not experiencing happiness and joy on eHarmony. i'm experiencing comparison, disappointment, and rejection. why did i do this again?)
Meet, laugh, and connect with a community of people that have a very important shared experience with you—they too met the love of their lives on eHarmony. We invite you to post pictures, videos, favorite moments, and dating highlights. Our goal is to create a very festive celebration on the eHarmony Facebook page and we can’t do it without you!! (love of my life? i would love to meet the love of my life, but i'm not even getting a chance to do that since eHarmony hasn't sent me a match in over a week. maybe i should join the facebook page and post all the hellish experiences i have had with eHarmony in the past and this round.)
It wouldn’t be a party without gifts, so we will be giving them out every week. So be sure to share your story on Facebook and invite other success couples to do the same. (i like gifts! i don't think they will give me a gift for a bad story, so maybe i'll just make one up. that would be hilarious!)
Thank you so much. We can’t wait to see you on Facebook. Just go to www.facebook.com/eharmony or click on the button below to join us! (screw you eHarmony. i don't like you anymore.)
With very warm regards,
The eHarmony Success Stories Team (maybe you should form an eHarmony failure stories team)
Maybe they haven't been sending you new matches because they think you already have one . . . uh oh.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE IT!! Totally agree!
ReplyDeleteObviously they messed up. You should try and get something free out of it. I agree with Banjos, and maybe they aren't giving you matches because of this error.
ReplyDeleteI met my husband on eHarmony and when I sent in our success story, they sent us a gift. Two hats that said eHarmony on them. I think one was beige, the other was blue. We have never once put them on. Don't know if they have any good prizes to give out...
ReplyDelete